A Shift in the Weather

I woke up this morning... and it was cold! :(

The wind has been blowing all night and has apparently brought with it the first breath of winter. I seriously had a moment earlier where I thought, maybe I'll just pick walking back up in the spring. However, I got my mile in today, wind and cold not withstanding, and have decided not to worry about however cold it gets or how much snow we have this winter. On days I can walk, I'll walk. On days I can't, I won't beat myself up over it. This is my life, it's not a race, there's no finish line on my health. It just is and I just will.

Awareness is Key

I believe being comfortable in your own skin is about more than weight. In fact, I believe it has very little to do with weight. I'm extremely comfortable in my skin, but not in my current body, so I thought we could talk a little about that because I don't want this daily conversation to be solely weight focused. I know weight is such a big issue, but I see it more as a symptom than a problem in and of itself most of the time. If you find a way to navigate your life that brings you peace and joy, if you find that place that is authentic for you, you will be far more able to handle your weight.

Here's the thing, life holds unlimited possibilities. It's like Disneyland. Anything you could ever want for joy and happiness is there, but you can't possibly do it all in one visit. A successful visit is achievable only when you research, plan, discuss and then accept the unpredictable like a ride breakdown.

What makes you passionate? What sends a surge of joy through your soul so potent you can't control it?

Do you have it in your mind?

How often do you partake that passion?

Do you live it?
Do you squeeze it in where you can?
Do you deny it completely?

Now I want to know, whatever your answer was... why?

If you're one of those people who lives their passion, share with us! Tell us why, tell us how you found the strength to grab it! If you rarely or never indulge, I want to know why to that also. Not because I think you're wrong, I make no judgements on your life, its yours, you have to navigate it, but you need to understand my family, they are the type of people who do things without thinking. Most of my family is now dead, but I remember as a child, a teen and an adult watching these people run from things, hide from emotions, just jump in without ever checking the water level in the pool. I have never understood that and from this, my passion for making people think has grown to a point where I can no longer hide it.

I've learned from my suffering and my trials and I strive to live authentically and intentionally no matter what, but I honestly do not want anyone to follow me and my life choices like a little mindless drone. That's not what I'm about. I have nothing invested in your life choices, but what drives me, and what grieves me, is to see you running your life with no real foundation or direction other than to do what everyone around you is doing. If I could give you one gift, it would be the gift of vision and clarity. Whatever choices you are making in your life, please just know why you are making them. Even the unhealthy ones, if you are at least aware of them, when you have the strength, you'll change.

Being self aware is key to authentic living and authentic living is key to abundant living and I know you want that and I want it for you more than anything!

 I realize no life is perfect,we always have things to trim and change and as we learn and grow, new things become important, our focus shifts, old things fade away. Life is fluid, accept that. I spent decades of my life thinking if I just got it to "this" place, it would somehow miraculously stay like a painting and all would be perfect in my world. It doesn't work like that. Life is more like a garden. You may have just been out there weeding, pruning and watering this morning, and you got that thing looking spectacular... this afternoon, the summer heat wilted it, weeds came back and you suddenly have an aphid infestation! It's okay, be calm, one trial at a time we lay the path that is our life.

As my life is transcending, so are my blogs, there may be a few bumps in the road ahead as I go through some construction, but please hang in with me. Life is an incredible journey and I only want to walk it with you if you'll let me. <3

A Little Change that Made a Big Difference

I'm so glad you came back. I'm excited about doing this blog because I feel like I'm finally at a place in my life where I no longer care about everyone else's opinion on my weight, how or if I should lose it. I want to share the things I've learned over years and years of living as an over weight woman and growing up in an over weight family. Some days the posts may not be long and eloquent, some days they may just be a celebration or a tip or, knowing myself the way I do, a rant about something that's annoyed me. ;-) I'm not going to tell you what to eat, or how your body should look. I'm not going to make the assumption that what is working for me will work for you. However, every day I blog, and my intention in this moment is to blog here Sundays, Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, I want to inspire you, teach you, encourage you and let you know that someone else feels what you feel, has been through what you've been through and has all the faith in the world in you to succeed at living a healthy life that is abundantly satisfying.

I believe life is an exciting adventure full of color and passions and beauty, but I think we get sucked down into the mundane, the disappointments, the things that don't work out, to the point that we forget about the good things all around us. Dieting can be this way especially.

Though I'm a writer and I work at home, I do spend long hours at my laptop creating love stories that will take my readers to a place of exquisite decadence where they can indulge in the all the wonderfulness of love and romance. As fantastic as my job is, it is rather consuming and I often forget to eat on writing days and for me NOT eating is my biggest problem with food.

I swear I find it so annoying to have to stop and eat something. lol

That being said, I've dedicated myself to being the most beautiful me I can be, inside and out, so that means I have to eat. I need to balance out my body's need for nutrition with my lack of willingness to stop what I'm doing and provide those nutrients. In my quest to find the answer to this dilemma for myself, I bought lean cuisine meals. I hated doing it because I don't think those meals are all that nutrient dense and a frozen meal in a black carton is not all that satisfying.

Now I'm very fortunate to still have my grown son in the house much of the time and he's been put in charge of making sure mom eats on writing days, because it is okay to ask for help when you need it! So I asked him to microwave my boxed meal of chicken and pasta, but I also asked him to steam broccoli, cook a few fries (my personal luxury food) then serve with mushrooms & spring onions and a sliced tomato...

I wish I had photographed the plate for you, it was stunning! Colors from white mushrooms and chicken to green spring onions and broccoli, purple grapes, orange bell pepper, red tomato, it was a beautiful looking dish.

 Even though I didn't think to photograph it, I want to show you this picture to your left which I simply pulled off the web. Remember part of being healthy is about being happy and satisfied and I find it difficult to believe anyone really feels those things over food in a black box, at the very least put it on a plate.

I know! You're thinking about the dishes, so what? Aren't you worth having a nice lunch? Aren't you worth a few dishes? Aren't you worth the time it takes to steam some broccoli? Just try it and see how it feels. My guess is you'll be surprised how much of a difference it will make.

I understand how hard life can be, how busy you can be, how much rests on your shoulders, but we have every right to take a moment for ourselves too and treat ourselves well. Add a glass of wine to that lean cuisine meal, sit at the table and I'll bet you, you forget that dinner came out of a box. You won't be hungry when you finish and you may even feel good about the choice you made, which is one of my personal favorite feelings on the planet.

So do me a favor, next time its just you for a meal, and you're thinking of skipping it, or your thinking of just microwaving or eating over the sink... don't. Try this. It wasn't difficult, the teen made it for me the first day I did this, but it did make a huge difference to how I felt and in the end I got my nutrients, my brain continued to work and so could I.

Be good to yourself, because really, you're the only one that ever really will. ♥